I was just talking to my son about failures.![\"Thomas](\"http:\/\/staceetaft.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/edison-in-lab.jpg\")
\nRight now he feels like he\u2019s failing at everything.
\nHe doesn\u2019t enjoy most of his school subjects {especially math}
\nbecause they aren\u2019t \u2018fun\u2019 or \u2018easy,\u2019
\nso he hasn\u2019t been interested in giving 100% to learn them\u2026
\nthus he doesn\u2019t get a perfect score.
\nThen he assumes he\u2019s a failure because of the results.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s wrong.
\nAnd he\u2019s not alone.<\/p>\n
We all fall into this mindset from time to time.
\nMy son is NOT a failure\u2026
\nhe simply hasn\u2019t succeeded yet.<\/p>\n
Edison is a great example of this.
\nHe had the right perspective on his failures\u2026
\non hard work\u2026
\non perseverance.<\/p>\n
\u201cI have not failed; I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.\u201d
\n\u201cMany of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked at his failures as chances to gain new data
\nor learn something he hadn\u2019t considered or,
\nperhaps, just cross a possible solution off of his idea list.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey [failures] taught me something that I didn’t know. They taught me what direction to move in.\u201d<\/p>\n
Failure, depending on perspective,
\nwill either bring opportunity or despair.
\nOnly one requires hard work and is worth the effort.<\/p>\n
\u201cOpportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.\u201d
\n\u201cGenius is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration.\u201d<\/p>\n
It\u2019s all about perspective.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust because something doesn’t do what you planned it to do doesn’t mean it’s useless.\u201d
\n\u201cWe sometimes learn a lot from our failures if we have put into the effort the best thought and work we are capable of.\u201d<\/p>\n
I love how Edison had the right perspective.
\nI am thankful he did, too.
\nThink of all the amazing inventions that were created
\nbecause Edison had the correct perspective on his failure.<\/p>\n
Mark and I try to pass this joy-filled, perseverance, correct perspective concept
\nto both our children.<\/p>\n
However, some days are harder than others.<\/p>\n
Like today.<\/p>\n
My son assumes there isn\u2019t a point to learning most of these subjects.
\nAgain, he\u2019s wrong\u2026
\nalthough I surely understand where he\u2019s coming from!<\/p>\n
Only a part of our schooling is the actual memorizing of facts, dates and formulas\u2026
\nthe other half is character development: self-discipline; learning to work hard at something
\neven when we hate it\u2026
\nin fact, learning to enjoy it;
\nperseverance when we feel like there is no end in sight;
\nobedience even if we don\u2019t understand the \u2018why\u2019 behind the instructions given.<\/p>\n
All of us have a choice when we approach any situation\u2026
\nWe can let our circumstances dictate how we think\/feel
\nor we can choose to be joy-filled.<\/p>\n
The latter does not come natural and requires God\u2019s strength and perspective.<\/p>\n
\u201cIf we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.\u201d<\/p>\n
I attempted to use the game Mastermind as an illustration.![\"Mastermind](\"http:\/\/staceetaft.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/mastermind-300x260.jpg\")
\nIf you\u2019ve ever played the game you know there is a long board with peg holes.
\nOne player chooses a pattern of colors, not letting the other player see.
\nThe other player, through a series of guesses, tries to use deductive logic to figure out the pattern.<\/p>\n
No one gets it the first time around.<\/p>\n
In fact, they give you almost 15 spaces on the board to try to figure it out.
\nBut each time you try, if you\u2019re paying attention, you will learn something.
\nPerhaps all you learn is that there isn\u2019t a blue peg in spot number one.
\nPerhaps you\u2019ll learn more.<\/p>\n
But the point is\u2026 if you see each one of those tries as a failure, you totally missed the point of the game.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s all about perspective.<\/p>\n
Now granted\u2026 in some people\u2019s cases just trying won\u2019t automatically equal success, but knowing my son like I do\u2026
\nhe can and will thrive and succeed at anything he chooses to.
\nAnd the fact that he doesn\u2019t yet get that grieves my heart.<\/p>\n
Even more so because he\u2019s my clone (in a boy-version).
\nI totally remember being where he is.
\nFeeling what he\u2019s feeling.
\nWanting to give up because I don\u2019t see the point of trying.
\nBeing lazy instead of diligent when it\u2019s hard or not fun.
\nSome days I\u2019m still right there with him! Even at the age of 40.<\/p>\n
This is why perspective is so critical.
\nHOW we see things dictates what we believe about\u2026 well\u2026 everything.
\nIf I don\u2019t choose to be joy-filled
\nand choose to be able to look beyond my circumstances,
\nmy \u2018right now\u2019 pressures of life, or in my son\u2019s case\u2026
\nhis daunting schoolwork syllabus\u2026
\nI WILL, by default, be thrown hither and yon by the circumstances that swirl and rage around me.<\/p>\n
My stresses, my to-do lists, my schedule, my responsibilities, my sagas\u2026
\nall the things that weigh heavily on my heart and mind\u2026
\nthey will crush me and steal my joy.<\/p>\n
And, in actuality, by not choosing to be joy-filled\u2026
\nI am giving my joy away.<\/p>\n
By choice.<\/p>\n
This, of course, is easier said than done.
\nIn my son\u2019s case\u2026
\nwe\u2019re just talking about schoolwork.<\/p>\n
But what he learns about how to face unpleasant \u2018little\u2019 things
\nthat feel\u00a0huge will translate later into how to face horrific things,
\nlike cancer, loss of a family member or job.<\/p>\n
So that when those things come\u2026
\nand they will\u2026
\nwe are not destroyed.<\/p>\n
Our joy is not lost\u2026
\neven in the midst of chaos and pain.<\/p>\n
So where does that leave my precious son?
\nWell thankfully, after a lengthy, rather drama-filled, conversation\u2026
\nHe\u2019s having his sister quiz him to make sure he\u2019s really studied well for his two tests tomorrow.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s daily, sometimes minute-ly, having to make the choice that we need to do things,
\nwalk through things that aren\u2019t desirable to us\u2026
\nto grow and get where God wants us to be.<\/p>\n
He doesn\u2019t always choose correctly.
\nBut today he\u2019s choosing joy
\n(via obedience, respect and a good attitude).<\/p>\n
He\u2019s choosing to work hard even though the pull
\nof rushing through his work carelessly so he\u2019s \u2018done\u2019 and can go play
\ntugs on him with force equal to a hurricane.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s choosing not to let his desire to play become an idol,
\nbut rather a goal to drive him to work harder,
\nsmarter, more efficiently and effectively.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s choosing his perspective.<\/p>\n
We all are choosing one or the other\u2026
\nevery day of our lives.
\nHe\u2019s choosing joy over circumstances.<\/p>\n
So am I.<\/p>\n
Which perspective are you choosing?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I was just talking to my son about failures. Right now he feels like he\u2019s failing at everything. He doesn\u2019t enjoy most of his school subjects {especially math} because they aren\u2019t \u2018fun\u2019 or \u2018easy,\u2019 so he hasn\u2019t been interested in giving 100% to learn them\u2026 thus he doesn\u2019t get a perfect score. Then he assumes […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,8,9],"tags":[37,38,53,70,72,73],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/374"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=374"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/374\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=374"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=374"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staceetaft.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=374"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}